this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Randomize
