i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize