the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize