I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
