Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
