my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
