I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
