You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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