Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize
