Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
it's not cheating when I paid for it
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
