The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
