I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
