New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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