I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
