You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
