my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
