If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
He passed out mid-signature
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Randomize
