I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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