Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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