She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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