Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
They have beer where we have blood.
Randomize
