we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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