I'm lost and stupid without you.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Randomize
