wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
