This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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