just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
