So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
