Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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