Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
