I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
