I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
