Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
