How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
