some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
