Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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