You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Randomize
