It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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