I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
