I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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