just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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