My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
