i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
