i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
