And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Randomize
