I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
