I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
