So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize