yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I want a musical about memes.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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