just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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