Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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