I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
