Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
