this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize