When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
